Coming soon:

I have no clue what's going to be on this weekend's show. It's another weekend of existential angst while I try to pull a show out of my ass.

Untitled Show # 12 & 35 (redux)

• Bullseye Stores: this comes from the recent Target commercials about how they're your back to school store, then they advertise a bunch of products that aren't what anyone remembers from college. I just tried to equalize that.
• Intro: I've been reading this book called, Aint Nobody's Business if I Do which is basically about the absurdity of making consensual activities illegal. It occured to me that one really could make as good an argument against caffeine as many illegal drugs. Also there was a recent news story about the girl who went to the hospital.
• Carlos Mencia: Okay, I know my Mencia impersonation is horrible, sorry. But we remake songs all the time, everyone is okay with that. We remake movies regularly, you'll see a repertoiry company do a play but poor Carlos steals other people's material and he's villified?!? Hardly seems fair.
• Camel: I love this song of mine, however, since 9/11/01 people think it's political even though it was written about ten years ago and is just a collection of rhymes that make me laugh
• Sending a Message to Our Enemies: I think this speaks for itself. Seriously though, who are our enemies and how many messages can we send by discussion? Isn't discussion, the open debate of ideas the whole point of a democracy?
• Spider Man: I just love this version of that song but I love all versions. It, the original, is surprisingly tough to play, we used to do it in the Black Tie Martini Club (the band). It's much faster and with more complicated harmonies than most songs.
• Vagina Subsidy: obviously this is influenced by the aforementioned libertarian book... and my love of saying Vagina Subsidy
• 1-900-GOOD-NAP: uh... I don't want to share... this one's personal.
• Je T'Aime... Mais Non Plus: This one's even more personal.

Goodnight Everybody!

From the correspondence file: Villains (coda)

Dear Baleb Cullen,

Thank you for your recent purchase of our services.While we were not able to come to an arraignment at this time, we hope to do business with you in the future.

Please accept this gift (attached Package) as a sign of our appreciation.

Here at Martian Incorporated, We want to be YOUR villain.


Sincerely,
Razzap Snookums
CEO, Martian Incorporated.



(sounds of opening package, a ticking sound, then an explosion)

Coming Up on the Next Black Tie Martini Club Oddcast

I'm a little backed up here folks so I think this weekend's show is going to be super-sized:

• Napping
• Long Distance Dedications
• Ripping Off Carlos Mencia
• Back To School Shopping
• Sending A Message To Our Enemies
• Brilliant Idea
• Won't Someone Think Of The Children
• Much Much More?

hey kids 8/28 is the anniversary of the I Have a Dream Speech that Martin Luther King Jr. made in Washington in 1963. I know, there are aspects of it that were plagarized and Dr. King had some skeletons in his closet but do yourself a favor. Look that speech up and read it aloud.

You'll be amazed at how far we've come in some ways and how little has changed in others. It's one of those important documents like the Bill of Rights, I can't help but go back to from time to time to recharge the spirit.

Say it loud, I'm back and I'm proud

Hi folks.

I'm back from my little vacation/birthday celebration. Sorry I missed you but the departure interfered with the normal Thursday blogging and then the trip interfered with the normal Sunday show. So next week I think we're going to have a double sized super show or perhaps a normal sized show with less music. Heh.

Villains (recap)

So, I think this episode mostly speaks for itself but I did want to call your attention to something I realized while I was recording the episode.

Everybody Eats When They Come To My House could really work as a gospel song if you think that Cab Calloway is singing in the voice of Jesus. He clearly accepts everyone because he mentions all manner of ethnic name from Jewish or Chinese to Irish (Mendel, Moxshu, Mickey). And yet all are welcome. It's not The Chosen Eat When They Come To My House or If You're Really Good And Follow My Commandments You'll Eat When You Come To My House. Cab/Jesus/Allah/Brahma welcomes everybody. It's kind of a beautiful all inclusive religious message. Or... it could be that Cab was really high and thought the rhymes were funny. Either way, I dig it.

In case you didn't catch the URLs of the Black Tie Martini Club Players they are
http://daphneandtamara.libsyn.com/ Going Broke With Daphne and Tamara
http://www.letsgetnaughtypodcast.com/ Let's Get Naughty
http://www.blakslee.com/ The Man Behind Razzap Snookums.

I'm afraid

Coming up on this weekend's show:

• The Return of Razzap Snookums
• The Return of Daphne
• The debut of Tamara
• More Ben Cohen
• Much Much More!

Seriously kids, this weekend's show is going to be a Black Tie Martini Club Players fiesta! There's going to be a bunch of stuff that isn't all me me me me me me me. At least there will be if it all gets written and recorded. heh.

Now then, on to the bloggish portion of the blog. I listened to about half of the Republican debate and they all can make sense on one or two issues but then do so much crazy ass politician double speak playing to their perceived base, I'm afraid of all of them.

That said, I'll vote for anyone over Hilary Clinton who hasn't made the same deal-breaking mistakes that she has. Most of the Republicans have and most of the other Democrats aren't much better so that leaves us where next year? I don't know.

Here's why I cannot vote for Hilary although she's not the worst politician in the world and has many decent qualities; She came out hard in favor of Flag Burning legislation and I believe she came out for the Amendment as well.

I know it's weird to make that my dividing line issue since it's not immediately important to anyone and there are so many bigger problems than flag burning right now. But A. there were bigger problems when Hilary was wasting time coming out against Flag Burning because she thought it was a perfectly safe issue that meant nothing and B. A flag that you can't burn doesn't really stand for freedom anymore.

I know I'm a crazy old coot when it comes to the constitution and it really fucks up my chances of sitting at either big table come dinner time in American Politics but The Constitution of these United States supersedes all the other stuff. If you don't think that the right to Free Speech is essential to our nation's survival, how are we to trust you on the complicated stuff?

And while we're at it, if you're against the personal privacy ensured by the 4th amendment, if you are anti-choice, pro illegal wiretap, if you want to take away American's rights of privacy in the name of your gods and 'safety' how can we trust you with the complicated stuff.

And yes, if you can't understand the second amendment and don't care about protecting the right of citizens to bear arms, you don't understand the Constitution you are sworn to uphold.

So if you believe in the separation of Church and State
If you Believe in Freedom of Speech and Freedom of the Press
If you believe in The Right to Bear Arms
If you believe in the right to be protected from unwarranted search and seizure

Who can you vote for?

Romney, McCain, Clinton and Giuliani have all failed the above test. I bet if I knew more about more of the candidates they too would fail.

So who does that leave?

Writer's Block Extravaganza (redux)

First of all, sorry about the beginning. My internet connection died partway through uploading the file and that's what happened. WHOOPS!

McHealthy's comes from two things. The first is that anything will taste good if you batter fry it and serve it on a stick, the other is that my workplace tries really hard to get us to eat healthy but the end result is we just load up on plastic calories.

I really did have a bad case of Writer's Block all weekend and was totally stumped. That I could pull any of this out of my ass is amazing.

Amore. This came to me in the shower... I honestly don't know why. For some reason it stuck me like a warning

It is what it is. Can someone tell me where this idiotic and pointless expression has come from in the last couple weeks? I went from never hearing it before to it being on everybody's lips like herpes.

While I'm asking Questions, is Lust for Life about the Kirk Douglas movie of the same name about Vincent Van Gogh?

I think the rest speaks for itself. 100 word stories, interviews, Isaac Hayes... goodnight everybody!